“Twelve Days of Calving”

posted by Chelsea

“The Twelve Days of Calving”–

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Sung to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”… but because there are so many gifts included in calving season, the lines will not be repeated in the typical Christmas-song-fashion.  Read carefully and by all means, between the lines!

On the first day of calving my true love gave to me… one (extremely) muddy pasture.

On the second day of calving my true love gave to me… two chilled down calves and one pocket knife.

On the third day of calving my true love gave to me… three bales of grain hay, two new gloves, and one gate left wide open.

On the fourth day of calving my true love gave to me… four spring-y heifers, three swollen teats, two charging mamas, and one prenatal appointment.

On the fifth day of calving my true love gave to me… five bags of colostrum, four (cute) baldy calves, three bulls out, two frozen square bales, and one bottle baby.

On the sixth day of calving my true love gave to me… six cups of coffee, five egg sandwiches, four potty stops, three pairs of dirty coveralls, two missed meals, and one very long shift at work.

On the seventh day of calving my true love gave to me… seven sterile needles, six whole hours of sleep, five more hours needed, four calf bottles, three sunny days, two bags of milk replacer and one huge fuel bill.

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On the eighth day of calving my true love gave to me… eight (extremely) muddy Bogs, seven heifers calving, six bags of mineral, five missed calls, four chilled down calves, three inches of snow, two birthday parties, and one renewed operating loan.

On the ninth day of calving my true love gave to me… nine loads of laundry, an eight degree morning, seven attempts at waking up the girls, six coyotes roaming, five worn out gloves, four “freezing” little girl feet, three stocking caps, two cups of tea, and one blessed hot bath.

On the tenth day of calving my true love gave to me… ten straw bales, nine calves to tag, eight gates to open, seven cords of wood we’re burning, six calls from work, five calls ignored, four needed shifts, three dogs a-howling (through the night?!), two marital disputes,  and one long winter stuck in the county.

On the eleventh day of calving my true love gave to me… eleven cows bawling, ten (different) weather reports, nine balls of twine, eight wet feet, seven dark chocolate eggs, six day dreams about Starbucks, five green baby-bull-banders, four baby-bulls needing banding, three colostrum tubers, two (human) baby deliveries, and one puking husband(?!).

On the twelfth day of calving my true love gave to me… twelve pitchforks of hay to the horses, eleven hours of continuous puking from the husband, ten toenails needing painted, nine hours left ’till bedtime, eight empty cans of ginger ale, seven complaints (from the pregnant lady) about the bumpy ride through the pasture, six loads of dishes, five smelly jackets, four windy days & nights, three more months of pregnancy, two more months until spring turn-out, and one reminder that the FUN HAS JUST BEGUN!

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Sweet Shot Day

10 Comments Leave a comment »


  2. Great song :) You have a great way of telling stories and keeping the humor in it all. Hope everyone is feeling better (especially husband) and that spring comes sooner than later for you since calving has begun!

  3. All I can say is…your AWESOME!
    Super Mom/Wife/Rancher/Nurse!

  4. Hahaha hehehe! Happy days of calving.

  5. Charity Ketscher

    March 3, 2012
    10:13 pm

    Oh Chelsea!! Sounds like a rough week, please holler if there is anything we can do to help! We would love to help with anything ( other than the puking husband, sorry, and can’t cover as a nurse!) we can do dishes, or paint toenails, feed, band, tag?! Love you, and your clever song!

  6. grandma Janie

    March 3, 2012
    10:45 pm

    Chelsea…that is sure a way to cope. writing down the humor about the reality of running a cow’calf outfit. Boy you nailed it. Poor Buck though, hope the soup helped. I’ve been there so many times…you too will make it, and some day, believe it or not , you’ll look back on it and laugh…or remember it as a time of really living…no boredom here. I left two bags of colostrum in your freezer on the way the fiddler’s contest this evening. No one was home. Hope things are better. You are raising two little cowgirls there. It is so good for them to see all this. Remember the family that works together stays together. I would love to use this song for the paper I write for. Wonderful stuff. Would you care? It should go in the Chieftain too, so many ranch gals would identify. You would have been proud of the way Riley played on the your fiddle. awesome.

  7. Whew, I feel like a nap after that :)

  8. AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! the joys of calving season and spring. Love your song, spot on. Happy days to you all. I be praying you don’t get that awful bug.

  9. I loved reading this post. Your first photograph is beautiful, and captures that moment of new life, thank you for inspiring me with it. I am looking forward to reading more on your blog.

  10. absolutely love that first photo! Love your song too! hehe

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